Firstly I want to make it clear as crystal that I like slapping the pig skin just as much as any guy. The smooth touch of a woman’s shaven gammon curtain is one of the few exotic pleasures that titillates my fleshy flagpole. However, have you ever thought about how cool a furry piglet could be? An enticing little shaggy porker would make world headlines and literally shutdown the internet. And if you haven’t worked out by now then I’m talking about vaginas, not pigs. In fact I’m 3 8th’s Jewish. However even in reality a sultry bush-laden minge does provide an over whelming horn on my behalf.
It depends on what mood I’m in but for the most part my impartial outlook lends itself towards well groomed rather than balding poon and if the aforementioned hairy piglet is starting to sprout dreadlocks then I’m singing “No woman no cry” all the way to the door. Keep it neat, keep it clean and if it smells a little bit like sweet melon then thats counting in your favour too.
So how do I keep the stallion? So smooth it shines like rubies? Or some mad Jungle Fever that requires a machete and a chainsaw just to tongue my pistachios? Neither, I have a dollar sign stencilled into my pubes… not really. My nether regions sit at a constant number 5 shave. Long enough not to prickle her forehead, but short enough so it looks bigger in the mirror.
Can men do landing strips without looking like Jenna Jameson with a shlong? Absolutely one hundred percent not. Who do you think you are? Is it ok for a man to get a belly ring? Is it ok for a man to have a dolphin tattoo on his lower back? No its fucking not, so why on earth do you think you can have a little tuft of sweetness right above your whacker and still believe you’re a manly super barbarian?
At the end of the day, I think you should keep it as comfortable as you can. If you’re in a board meeting and have to excuse yourself for a quick groin itch in the hallway then you’re doing it wrong. If you have to leave your nut sack in a glad wrap package of baby powder, then youre doing it wrong. Or if it looks like Jimi Hendrix’s Afro is protruding from between your thighs, then you’re doing it wrong. But I encourage experimentation. Go out and get yourself a snazzy design and just feel shexy, because you could always bed a freaky sex minx thats in the mood for something different. And if your’re a woman… that would be me!